The Worlds Funniest Dinosaur Jokes

The Worlds Funniest Dinosaur Jokes Dinosaurs have been the subjects of many serious movies, from King Kong in 1933 and its remakes, through animations such as The Land Before Time series, and on to later special-effects-laden extravaganzas including the Jurassic Park/World features. They are the focus of serious-minded research conducted in natural history museums and universities throughout the world. But dinosaurs have long been the focus of humor, including a bevy of jokes at the expense of these long-gone beasts, which roamed the earth millions of years ago. Here, then, is a crop of  the funniest jokes involving the  terrible lizards, better known as dinosaurs: Why do museums have old dinosaur bones?Because they cant afford new ones! What does a triceratops sit on?Its tricera-bottom! Why did the  tyrannosaur  cross the road?Because chickens hadnt evolved yet.Because it was chasing a chicken.Because it was being chased by a chicken. What’s the best way to talk to a  velociraptor?Long distance! How do you ask a tyrannosaur out to lunch?Tea, Rex? What was 30 feet long, had a two-foot-long beak, and left crumbs all over the mattress?Pretzelcoatlus! Dad:  Why are you crying?Son:  Because I wanted to get a dinosaur for my baby sister.Dad:  Thats no reason to cry.Son:  Yes, it is. No one would trade me! How do you know theres a seismosaurus under your bed?Because your nose is two inches from the ceiling! What’s better than a talking vulcanodon?A spelling bee! Whats worse than a giraffe with a sore throat?A tyrannosaur  with a giraffe in its throat! What do you call a gigantoraptor that wont stop talking?A dino-bore! Why cant you hear a pterosaur using the bathroom?Because the p is silent! How can you tell theres an allosaurus in your bed?By the bright red A on its pajamas. Person 1:  I keep seeing  pteranodons  with orange polka dots.Person 2: Have you seen an eye doctor yet?Person 1:  No, just pteranodons with orange polka dots! How can you tell theres a stegosaurus in your refrigerator?The door wont close! What family does shantungosaurus belong to?I dont know. I dont think any family in our neighborhood owns one! What has a prominent head crest, a duck-like bill, and 16 wheels?A Maiasaura on roller skates! Why did carnivorous dinosaurs eat raw meat?Because they didnt know how to barbecue! What has sharp fangs and sticks to the roof of your mouth?A peanut butter and jeholopterus sandwich. Child 1:  Hey, who stepped on your foot?Child 2:  Well, did you see that  gorgosaurus  over there?Child 1:  Yes.Child 2:  Well, I didnt! What do you call a terrible, horrible, unpleasant dinosaur?A thesaurus. What is a dinosaurs least favorite reindeer?Comet! Why dont dinosaurs ever forget?Because they never knew anything in the first place! What happened when the brachiosaurus took the train home?He had to bring it back! Whats purple and green and wont stop singing?Barney taking a shower! What do you say to a 10-ton Albertosaurus wearing earphones?Whatever you want. He cant hear you! Child 1:  I lost my pet  iguanodon!Child 2:  Why dont you put an ad in the paper?Child 1:  What good would that do? He cant read! What did dinosaurs use to make their hot dogs?Jurassic pork! Can you name 10 dinosaurs in 10 seconds?Yes, one gorgosaurus and nine velociraptors! What dinosaur could jump higher than a house?All of them. Houses cant jump! What should you do if you find a blue dilophosaurus?Try to cheer him up!